{Many people in a relationship keep secrets from their partners because they think telling the truth will only make things worse. Or they believe their partner will not be able to handle the truth and it might end their relationship.
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Dictionary .com defines a secret as something done, made or conducted without the knowledge of others. Something kept from the knowledge of another person. When that person is your spouse or partner – it is important to wonder why.

Studies show that keeping secrets in a relationship is a betrayal and once your partner finds out any secret on his own things become worse. In telling the truth and not having secrets in a relationship will make you feel better.

Some secrets can be small and insignificant; those types of secrets can cause no harm like planning a birthday surprise, celebration among others. And on the other hand, some secrets are painful; life changing that can damage the entire relationship for some time however being open in a relationship is a major way of keeping it for so long.

Five reasons why it’s a good idea not to keep secrets:

1. You will feel better about yourself. Honesty is always the best policy and most of us have a moral code which tells us that keeping secrets is akin to lying. For most of us, being dishonest is only acceptable when we are terrible situations like trying to save someone’s live.

2. Keeping major secrets is a form of cheating and the more time that passes, the harder it is to fess up.

3. Being deceitful breeds mistrust. Further, once a person loses trust it is hard to regain especially for those who have been betrayed by a parent or former romantic partner.

4. Keeping secrets is a center for betrayal. Leaving out important facts can lead to further deception or betrayal, according to author Dr. Lisa Firestone. Whereas being open with your partner will promote trust and honest communication.

5. People are hurt by lies and grow apart. It’s hard to feel emotionally connected to someone when you catch them in a lie or find out that they’ve kept a secret from you.
Trust is about so much than catching your patner in a truth or a lie. It is about believing that he or she truly has the best interest at heart, when people aren’t feeling safe enough in a relationship to be honest and open with their patner it’s because they don’t believe that their patner truly loves them or they are over protective of their own interest.

Some people believe that they need to keep secrets or lie to survive in their relationship. They lack confidence in their ability to confront pleasant topics such as money troubles or issues related to past or present mistakes.

But finding a way to express your self to your partner is the best way to build a trusting relationship.

Let’s end on the words of Lisa Firestone, “When it comes to truth, think about whether you want people to trust you.

Do you value integrity and want your words to be reflected in your actions? If you commit to these attributes on a behavioral level, you’ll be better able to gain trust and live your life with honest, open communication.

This world may not be perfect, nor the truth always easy to take, but you can find peace and freedom in the security of knowing that the world you’ve created around you is a real as it gets.”