Relationship goals this new year

By Zaninka Umutesi
On 31 December 2022 at 09:18

One of the biggest challenges in any relationship is making room for growth. It is easy to get stuck in our ways, especially when we have been with someone for a long time. We get comfortable, and we stop making an effort.

But since we are starting a new year and making goals for our careers, health and wealth, why not do the same for our relationships?

Setting relationship goals for the new year will help you focus on what you want to achieve as an individual and as a couple or family. And by making room for growth, you are ensuring that your relationships will continue to thrive and grow.

To do this, grab a piece of paper and a pencil, and list goals for all your relationships.

Under each one, write down what you would like the relationship to look like in the new year.

Be specific with your goals, you cannot write that you need to get better, write the ways in which you want to see a change.

Maybe you wish to spend more time with your partner, create boundaries with your family or start a tradition of having dinner with your children every night.

Once you have all your goals written down, it is time to plan how to achieve them.

Achieving your dream relationship

There are steps that we take to get to our desired destination, and for your dream relationship, these might help:

 Be intentional: For instance, if you want more quality time with friends and family, make an action plan with a timeline. It can be sharing lunch on your break with loved ones for 30 minutes each week.

This will keep you accountable and help you create a routine with your loved one.

 Create reasonable expectations. Avoid making rash promises or being too harsh on yourself. It’s critical to recognize and respect the boundaries that each of us has.

We make plans to hang out with friends or relatives we haven’t seen in a while, only for reality to set in and remind us that we have work, a christening, a wedding, or other obligations on the day we planned to spend time with them.

It leads to arguments and accusations of lying, which makes us feel inadequate and causes self-loathing.

You should also be aware of the people you spend time with, making sure they are comfortable because some people want to connect with others as little as possible.

 Be adaptable in how you achieve your objectives; if something doesn’t work out as you go, change it.

If your spouse has been working more than normal and it has been preventing you from having your regular lunch dates, do not let this start an argument; instead, modify your approach.

As we grow, our duties rise as well, so if lunch doesn’t work, try supper or a quick coffee break with them or wait until the weekend.

 Be adaptable to your approach to achieving your objectives; if anything changes along the way and ceases to be effective for you, make the necessary adjustments!

If you believe you are the only one putting in effort or are not acknowledged as you should be, speak out. If nothing changes, make modifications that suit your needs.

 Acknowledge success from the little things, such as a daily text from a loved one, to voluntarily spend more time with your family without waiting for Christmas or Thanksgiving.

 At any point in the relationship if the cracks become holes, meaning what you thought was playful banter turns into mean words, then arguments.

If you start to realize that the relationship has become toxic, then it is best to find a relationship counselor if you wish to continue.

Relationships need more time and work since they are considerably more intricate.

The most important thing to remember is that the relationship goals are tailored for you and your partner. While some goals may be similar for all couples, others will be unique to your relationship.

What matters most is that you and your partner are on the same page and working towards the same goals. If you can do that, you are well on your way to a successful relationship.

Happy New Year!