What to do if you find yourself dating someone who doesn’t celebrate valentine’s day

By Zaninka Umutesi
On 8 February 2023 at 03:03

Valentine’s Day is just a few days away, and you now discover that your new boo finds that entire day commercialized and romanticized and they don’t celebrate it. What do you do? Where do you go from here?

According to someone’s beliefs, February 14th is just another Hallmark holiday that was made for profit or another pagan holiday.

For others, it may be the only day of the year they get to express their love for one another. Sad, I know.

However, not everyone celebrates Valentine’s Day. In fact, some people would rather avoid the day entirely.

Here are some tips for keeping your relationship with your significant other going, regardless of whether they celebrate the holiday or not.

Understand their reasons for not celebrating

Consider that you are in a relationship with someone who has a past, a family background, personal or religious beliefs that might discourage them from celebrating this holiday.

Their religion may disapprove of such celebrations, and they may opt not to participate in such events based on their religious commitment.

Depending on their upbringing, they may not only avoid Valentine’s Day, but also all things romantic.

People who were raised in a culture where emotions were not shown or where their parents argued every other day, but got gifts on Valentine’s Day, feel that this day is pretentious, so they avoid it.

It could also be possible relationship fails that carries bad memories to this day so they don’t celebrate it.

Whatever it is, allowing your partner to voice their reason for not wanting to celebrate this day is beneficial to your relationship and your sanity.

This is going to save you time by overthinking their grounds for not celebrating while also giving you a chance to learn about your partner.

Ask yourself if you are willing to not celebrate this holiday for the sake of your relationship

Are you willing to compromise and give up on celebrating valentine’s day for your relationship because your partner does not celebrate it?

Some people celebrate this holiday with their loved ones just so they don’t feel left out.

You don’t want to be the only one who gets nothing from your significant other when all your friends, including the ones who are single, are happily receiving and giving romantic gifts.

You could also be a true romantic and this day happens to be your favorite holiday, but for a relationship with your perfect romantic partner, whose one flaw is not celebrating this day, are you willing to give up on valentine’s or your relationship?

After giving your partner’s reason for not celebrating this holiday, you should carefully evaluate if their reason is valid enough for you to give up on valentine’s day celebration.

You don’t want to slowly despise your partner over such an issue or find yourself cheating on them over such an issue.

If your significant other is really adamant about avoiding Valentine’s Day and you are okay with that then you can simply give it up, but don’t allow anyone to bully you into not celebrating a day you enjoy if it is important to you.

Remove the phrase ’valentine’s’ all-together

Valentine’s day doesn’t have to be valentine’s day, it can be ’lovers’ day’ or whatever you wish to call it.

This will allow you to not feel as though you are celebrating this holiday like everyone but in your own way as a couple.

This could be a compromise for a couple with one who enjoys this holiday and another who wishes the 13th of February would be followed by the 15th.

Celebrate the holiday on a different day...or not at all!

Instead of celebrating on that day, switch things up a bit and plan another activity for the following day or even the next week instead.

Seven whole days leading up to this valentine’s day have been given meaning. And you can use those days to show how much you mean to each other and allow valentine’s day to be a normal day.

It’s not worth the stress of forcing someone to celebrate a holiday if they don’t want to participate in any way.

Make it "Valentine’s Day" regularly!

You don’t have to wait until this holiday to express your love for your partner, which is one of the reasons some people don’t celebrate it and also because it puts too much pressure on a couple.

You should be able to say "I love you" whenever you want and not just wait for a special occasion.

Remember just because they’re not into celebrating the holiday doesn’t mean that they don’t appreciate receiving your love all year round.

Your partner might not be the commercialized valentine’s day type but we all love to be loved and pampered, so make it a day to pamper each other.